Hockey Team Gets Chucked For Too Much Beer, Torn Rectum

Yep, you read that right.  A Kingsville Arena men’s hockey team got the boot after too many instances of post game shenanigans.  The Sunday Morning Puck Shufflers and a Friday night team were banned from the arena after excessive complaints about drinking, smoking, and post game behavior.  The teams would get belligerently drunk after the games and refuse to leave the dressing rooms that they were busy trashing.  Police have even been called to the scene, several times.  Up to five cases of empties have been found at a time by cleaning crews.  In one particular incident last month a player was seriously injured when rough housing turned ugly and he tore his rectum when he fell on a beer bottle… yeah, we’re wondering how that’s possible too.

The Puck Shufflers met with the council early this week and were able win back their privileges after signing a contract and giving proof of a $2 million insurance policy for the team.  Players must be out of the locker rooms 30 minutes after the final buzzer.

[Hockey]